A Dunmer's Secret Affection
by reikat
Summary: After defeating Miraak, Eriah finds herself on the shores near Tel Mithryn where she meets up with her friend, Talvas. She confides in him how she feels about her entire adventure on Solstheim. Talvas, meanwhile, does a lot of soul-searching in regards to his feelings for her. Takes place after Final Clash of the First and the Last. TWO-SHOT.
1. Chapter 1

Eriah was sitting on the shore of Solstheim. Tel Mithryn, the home and laboratory of the Telvanni wizard Neloth, was nearby. She had decided to meditate at the shore before continuing on her way to Raven Rock, hoping the _Northern Maiden_ would be docked there so she could leave the island. If not, she planned on staying in her temporary home, Severin Manor, for the time being and probably pass the time by forging some new armor. Her Blades Armor had taken a beating in her fight with Miraak and she decided it was time to turn the armor into a decoration in Hjerim once she got the house. She was now confident enough in her skill as a blacksmith to try her hand at Daedric Armor. She had mined enough ebony (after getting to the bottom of a mystery and allowing the town to reopen Raven Rock Mine) to do the job and she hoped her Dunmer friend, Milore, had Daedric Hearts in stock. Eriah had come into possession of Severin Manor when she helped Second Councilor Adril Arano stop a plot by the Severin Family to assassinate First Councilor Lleril Morvayn. It had taken a bit of detective work and tangoing with the Morag Tong before the threat was neutralized. Councilor Morvayn was so grateful, he gave Eriah the manor as a thank-you gift. It came equipped with its own forge which had been a boon for her.

Her adventures on this small island holding of Morrowind had been amazing at best and bittersweet at worst. In order to make her way to Apocrypha, Eriah had been forced to cooperate with the Daedric Prince of Knowledge and Fate, Hermaeus Mora in order to receive the Black Book that would take her to Miraak. The final battle not only sealed the First's fate but it also cemented Eriah's all-abiding hatred for Mora, who played them both like harps for his own amusement. After defeating her foe, Eriah took every last reminder of his existence, short of his very bones, back to Solstheim with her. Robes, weapons...his mask. It all came back with her. She had conflicting feelings regarding the man. He had to be stopped because the whole island suffered under his influence so she rightfully saw him as the enemy. To say nothing of what could've happened if he managed to break free of Apocrypha. However, the fact he was Dragonborn like she was had thrown a wrench in things. She regretted much while on the island. The death of the Skaal shaman, Storn, weighed most heavily on her mind. Aside from those, most of her feelings were a maelstrom she couldn't pin down and she was left feeling empty.

As for why she chose Tel Mithryn's stretch of shore to meditate on, it was easy. She had helped Neloth retrieve the first of Hermaeus Mora's Black Books in Nchardak, a Dwemer ruin, and did various favors for him afterwards while trying to figure out options to avoid being Mora's puppet. She also befriended his bedraggled apprentice, Talvas Fathryon, while doing so. Talvas was a good soul and she really wanted to smack Neloth for being a poor excuse of a master. However, given the Dunmer's great wisdom and aid in her own quest, Eriah had developed a grudging respect for the wizard and figured Talvas would eventually learn more magic from him. Tel Mithryn was something of a second home for her on Solsthiem, after Raven Rock, and it exuded an aura of peace and tranquility once she moved past Neloth's overbearing ego that permeated the place. After reaching Tel Mithryn and deciding to meditate, Eriah removed all her armor pieces and was left in the clothes she wore under the armor. She had Miraak's mask on the ground in front of her where she sat cross-legged with her eyes closed. Normally, she'd meditate in front of a statue of Talos but given his lack of statuary on Solsthiem, she settled for the soothing sound of the waves.

"Oh, Eriah. I didn't know you were here." came the voice of Talvas. Eriah just took a deep breath as she heard him sit down next to her before she opened her eyes to look out over the sea. "I just got back. Decided to sit a while before continuing to Raven Rock." she replied, picking up the mask in front of her. Talvas looked down at it, his red eyes soon finding their way back to her profile. "So...it's done then? You did what you came here to do?" he asked. "Yes, indeed. Solstheim is safe and Miraak will never threaten the island again. I indirectly saved Skyrim as well. Who knows what he would've done if he managed to escape." she answered. She ran her fingers over the mask in her hands before sighing again. "You don't seem overly pleased." the Dunmer observed. Eriah shrugged before setting the mask aside and shifting so her knees were to her chest. "I know you see me simply as a Nord, Talvas. But I'm more than that. I'm Dragonborn. My soul and blood are that of a dragon. That puts me in a whole other class altogether. Miraak...was the same. He, too, was a dragon soul wrapped in the body of a mortal man. It wasn't until I was made aware of his existence that I realized just how alone I am." she said.

Talvas met her gaze and felt his face warm up a bit. Naturally, Master Neloth easily figured out that his apprentice was rather...fond of the Dragonborn. Whether it was out of respect or fear of Eriah's Voice, he never spoke about it when she was around but when she wasn't, he grilled Talvas over it relentlessly. He was always saying that it was rather foolish for his apprentice to harbor such feelings. Talvas didn't care. He was crushing hard. Had been since he saw her power in action and truly saw how strong a woman could be. He said nothing because he knew it wouldn't amount to anything. He knew she was thinking of someone else but by the Nine how he wished he could find out the name of that man and do something about it. Talvas sighed before reaching around her shoulders and pulling her to him. Eriah squeaked a little as he did. "You're not alone, you know. Miraak may have been the same as you but he's nothing like you. Unlike him, you have friends...people who care about you." he said. _"And a man right here who loves you, if only you'd see that."_ his mind continued.

Eriah just blinked a little before settling a bit. This wouldn't be the first time a man had his arm wrapped around her. Her best friend, Ralof, often did it when she needed some support after many battles in the ongoing civil war at home. It was a huge comfort to know she had friends to watch her back. Talvas had never been this familiar with her before and she figured it was because she was having a bit of a survivor's crisis at the moment. She cursed Hermaeus Mora even more for this. If he hadn't interfered, she could've washed her hands of the First Dragonborn and gotten on with her life despite knowing what she did. But because the Daedric Prince used her as a pawn to distract his traitorous servant, Mora denied her the right to put an end to Miraak. He left Eriah with loose ends she could never tie up now. She was almost sure that the cultists tracking her down in Windhelm had been his handiwork, given that Miraak genuinely seemed surprised when the Black Book from Nchardak pulled her into Apocrypha the first time. The finer details were murky so that was really the best conclusion she could come up with.

Still, despite her intense hate for the first of her kind, Eriah was not immune to the loneliness and sorrow she felt upon being returned to Solstheim when it was all over. It had many different sources. Despite her overwhelming success, it came after many unforgivable failures. She didn't know how Frea could ever forgive her for Storn's death, knowing that Mora had backed her into a corner and Eriah essentially had no choice in the matter. Yet, the new Skaal shaman had done just that. She was at peace knowing her father's death wasn't for nothing and Storn himself had been fully prepared to help her so long as Miraak was stopped. Eriah's self-loathing wasn't appeased so easily and her dragon soul, the side of her that hated being dominated, stirred up a maelstrom of intense rage. The Dragonborn honestly had no idea how to talk about it. She didn't know if anyone else could possibly understand what she was feeling, much less help her come to terms with the things she simply could not control. This was one of those times where she felt completely isolated and worthless.

"It never should've gone the way it did." she muttered, catching Talvas's attention. He looked down at her to see her hugging the mask to her chest. It seemed a subconscious act on her part. "What other choice did you have, though?" the Dunmer asked, shifting so he could face her a bit better. "That's what makes it worse. Mora played me like a piece on a damn chess board. Being denied a choice never sat well with me, even before learning I was Dragonborn. This is why my parents never tried arranging a marriage for me. Choice is too important to me. Mora took my freedom away and I watched Storn die so I could get the final Word of the Bend Will Shout so I could have a shot at defeating Miraak. That is unforgivable. There had to have been another way." she said. Talvas placed his hand under her chin to make her meet his red eyes. "If there had been, I know you would've found it. However, in the game of life, we often have decisions made for us." he said. Eriah blinked. He made logical sense but the downside to her compassionate heart was a penchant for regrets. She could truthfully say she hated Miraak for what he had done and planned to do but this one truth remained. "It still feels like I lost someone important." she said. "Perhaps you did. Why else would you bring back that accursed mask back with you? Things will work out, Eriah. Just remember you're a Nord first and a dragon second. If you can carve those words into your heart, you'll never feel alone." Talvas said.

The Dragonborn was quiet for a bit before sighing a bit and standing up, taking hold of Miraak's mask as she did. "I'd better go. I have to see if the _Northern Maiden_ is here and I'll be leaving the island for Skyrim." she said. Talvas stood up with her. "I'll walk with you." he said. She gave him a small smile and the two set off. After a bit, the Dunmer conjurer looked at his companion. She was off in her own little world and his heart twisted with envy when he saw her was a bit red. _"Who is the man who occupies your thoughts? I want to know but as much as I'm afraid of losing you to him...I don't want to lose your friendship either. Gods save me."_ he thought. "You sure Neloth's not going to care that you left without telling him?" Eriah suddenly asked. "Er...I don't think he'll notice. But if he does, I can handle anything he throws at me." he replied. "Pretty confident for a sorcerer's apprentice. I don't want you getting in trouble on my account." the Dragonborn said. She had him there. Talvas had talent but Neloth usually didn't teach him anything unless pestered to death. "I'll be fine. I promise." he said. Eriah just pat him on the shoulder before silence fell.

Several hours later, the two reached Raven Rock. To Eriah's disappointment and Talvas's private joy, the _Northern Maiden_ wasn't there. Speaking to Adril revealed it wouldn't be back for another three days. The Dragonborn had preferred to be off-island that day but seeing as she was stuck, she decided to go through with her plan to forge some Daedric Armor. "You can head back to Tel Mithryn, Talvas. No need to stay on my account." she said as she headed for the shop stalls to pull together some things she needed to start forging in the Manor. "I want to stay and keep you company. Master Neloth can manage without me." he insisted. Shrugging, Eriah led the way to Milore's stand. "Hi, Milore." she said to the Dunmer alchemist. "Welcome back, Eriah. What can I do for you?" she asked. "I was wondering if you had any Daedric Hearts in stock. I'm planning on forging some new armor and those hearts are a key ingredient I need to make it work." the Dragonborn said. "You're in luck, then. When the _Northern Maiden_ was in town a couple days ago, she had a shipment of hearts for me. How many do you need?" Milore asked. "I need at least five." Eriah replied. The alchemist rummaged around in a chest and pulled out a bag. "Five's all I got so you're lucky. Good fortune to you in forging that armor." she said, handing the bag over. Eriah forked over the appropriate number of septims and headed for the Manor.

Talvas made to follow her but Milore caught his arm. "When are you going to man up and tell the girl you love her already?" she asked bluntly. The conjurer balked a little but managed to find his tongue again. "How did you know?" he asked. Milore gave him a knowing smile. "You're as subtle about it as an arrow to the face. It's a wonder she hasn't noticed, given how perceptive she is." she replied. Talvas looked down at his boots. "She's in love with someone else. I don't want to put her on the spot with how I'm feeling." he said. Milore shook her hooded head. "How you go about it is your business. But whatever you decide, I can only hope you don't regret it." she said. She waved him off and he caught up with Eriah who had waited. "What did Milore want?" she asked. "Nothing...nothing at all." Talvas replied, trying to keep his voice light. He was rewarded with a cocked eyebrow and a suspicious look but the Dragonborn just shrugged and continued on her way. The Dunmer man mentally smacked himself hard. Milore had a point. Eriah was a perceptive woman and if someone like Milore noticed how he felt, why didn't the Dragonborn notice and confront him on it?

Once they were in the Manor, Eriah went to the master bedroom and pulled her Blades Armor off and set it on a mannequin. Talvas watched as she paused for a moment before opening her bag and pulling out some strange robes along with the mask she had. "I think...for now, I'll enshrine him here." she said before setting to work on getting the robes onto another mannequin. She finished it off by setting the mask on it. "Perfect." she said before grabbing the bag of hearts. Talvas caught her by the arm as she went by. "Are you sure you want to see those out in full view? He hurt you so much during your stay here on Solstheim." he said. Eriah met his red eyes. "That's going to stay with me whether or not I brought his effects back with me. Miraak may have been one of my greatest foes but that doesn't mean I don't respect the man for his power and ambition for wanting to break from Hermaeus Mora. I'd do the same if I ever got into his position." she replied. Talvas couldn't argue with that and let her go. She went to the forge while he decided to give her some space. He went to the guest bedroom and stretched out on the bed. It didn't take long for the sounds of the forge being fired and a hammer hitting metal to fill the Manor.


	2. Chapter 2

Three days passed in relative peace. Eriah spent most of her time holed up in Severin Manor, painstakingly creating her Daedric Armor. Talvas ended up staying there the entire time, sending a message with Neloth's new steward when the wizard finally noticed he was missing. The apprentice didn't want to miss a single moment with the Dragonborn. He knew that once she left Solstheim, she never planned to return. When she wasn't forging her armor, she was packing things into a chest for Glover Mallory, the town blacksmith she had befriended, to help take to the docks when the _Northern Maiden_ returned. She repaired her Blades Armor before packing it away but left Miraak's robes on the mannequin and his weapons on the one-weapon racks on either side of it, wanting them to be the last things packed away for her to take home to Skyrim. She moved with a sense of finality that wasn't lost on Talvas, who had spent the better part of two days trying to come up with a way to convince her to stay. He knew she had a commitment to continue fighting the civil war that plagued Skyrim but that didn't stop him from wishing. In the end, he didn't have a single clue and he was starting to feel desperate.

"Finally done." Eriah said, straightening up to admire her handwork. The Daedric helmet was the last piece made and she felt accomplished. Even though she had also forged a Daedric warhammer, it was for the intent of making it a part of Hjerim's decor someday. She was still partial to her Elvish warhammer, which had been her faithful companion through many adventures. She also forged a Daedric shield for the same purpose. Talvas followed her to the master bedroom where she had the armor, boots, and bracers on a mannequin and watched her set the helmet on the thing's head. A complete set. The Daedric warhammer was on the rack next to it. The eerie red glow in certain parts of the armor set were the result of the Daedric hearts. "Are you seriously considering wearing this armor now? It's rather dark for you." Talvas said, crossing his arms. "It's stronger than my Blades armor and I want to send a stronger message to the Thalmor and the Empire. See how brave their soldiers are when they're faced with a warrior wearing this armor." she replied.

She felt the Dunmer close the gap and gasped when his arms came around her from behind, one going around her waist and the other around her shoulders. Her back met his chest and she felt him bury his face in her hair. Her hands instinctively came up to the arm around her shoulders but his grip tightened a little. "You don't have to prove anything to them. You don't even have to leave. You can stay here, away from it all." he said in a low voice. Swallowing hard, Eriah just kept still. Seemed her hunch, which she had ignored all this time due to more urgent matters, was correct. No man would've dared do this if he didn't have something bubbling under the surface, knowing the kind of power she had. "You know I can't do that, Talvas. It's painful being here anymore and I can't abandon Skyrim to the Thalmor. I must do as destiny wills." she said. Talvas responded by tightening his grip further. "You're so...contradictory. You have certainly shown that you don't like being yanked around but you willingly accepted a destiny you didn't choose for yourself." he said. "You're right. I didn't choose this but I did choose to follow this path laid out to me by Akatosh. It's one thing to willingly follow another's command and another thing entirely to be forced into it." she said. Silence fell for a moment. The Dunmer made no move to let her go so Eriah made no move to get away. She knew the conversation wasn't over and decided this was the best way she could help him out.

"Who do you think about when silence falls between us, Eriah? I know there's a man you think fondly of." Talvas then said. The Dragonborn felt her face heat up as he dipped his face into the crook of her neck. Given her existential crisis, courtesy of Miraak, and her growing feelings for Ulfric Stormcloak, Eriah was caught between a rock and a hard place. She had had sweethearts when she was younger. What girl didn't? This was just out of the blue, even though she had had her suspicions for a while. Eriah's desire to go unnoticed as she traveled around Skyrim was part of the reason most people didn't know her by her true name. All most people knew was that the Dragonborn had come to save them just as the prophecy had foretold. Talvas's behavior made her question just how many men really took notice of her, something she tended to avoid because of her desire to help the people of Skyrim with whatever ailed them. "If I tell you...what will you do?" she asked instead. "If I thought it would change your mind about leaving, I'd find that man and kill him." he replied simply. Eriah jerked involuntarily but she was kept from getting away by Talvas's embrace. "I would never allow that." she said. "That's why I won't do anything. His name. I want the name of the man who has your heart." the conjurer said.

Eriah shut her eyes tightly as she felt his lips ghost over her neck. "Who it is...is my business. He doesn't know...how I feel. Ironically, I only just started having these feelings and now, you're just forcing me to confront them. Whether or not I tell him anything remains to be seen." she replied. Her hands balled into fists as she dipped her head. "Then I have a chance, then." Talvas said. Eriah managed to get out of his arms and she turned to face him, her expression one of sad anger. Not directed at him but at the situation. "Turn off this road you're on, friend. There's only one way this is going to end and I'd rather not be the bad guy." she said. The Dunmer's face twisted a bit in anger. "Dammit, woman! I'm bearing my heart and soul to you! Why won't you notice me!?" he all but demanded, taking her by the upper arm. Before she could do anything to stop him, Talvas kissed her. It wasn't rough, per say, but it was passionate. It was enough to make even the Dragonborn pause because it had been a long time since a man had ever kissed her. Her last relationship ended five years before she left home. However, her thoughts sped up to the present and she knew she could not let this continue. Eyes screwing up tightly, Eriah's fist connected with his face. The force behind the blow was incredible. The Dunmer crashed to the ground. Without even thinking about it, the Dragonborn Shouted, activating Dragon Aspect. Her warhammer was in her hand and she shoved Talvas back down with the head of it as he was slowly sitting up. The glowing aspects of her dragon heritage hummed.

"If it wasn't for our friendship holding me back, I'd do a lot worse and not feel guilty. You had no right. No right at all. I had known for a long time how you feel. I chose not to acknowledge it because it would just give you false hope and I'll be damned if I ever did. Sorry, Talvas. I can't give you what you want because my heart is no longer mine to give." she said. Talvas's red eyes just looked up at her, his cheek bruising from her hard right. He looked down first. "I won't apologize." he said, mutinously. "I don't expect you to. I won't apologize for punching you, either. You needed to be brought down a peg." she replied. She slowly brought her weapon back and stepped away. "Look at me, Talvas." she said. When he did, she looked at the ethereal energy that wreathed her body. "This is what I am. A dragon who made it her mission to save Skyrim from the elves that seek to dictate to _my_ people, the Nords, who we can worship. I...I can't be the woman you want, not with this heavy burden I bear and with my heart in another man's hands." she said, letting her warhammer come to rest on the floor as she stood it on its head. The conjurer slowly sat up.

Talvas watched as she knelt down in front of him, listening to the hum of Dragon Aspect. "I never had a chance, did I?" he asked simply. Eriah just bowed her head and shook it, the Shout finally dissipating. "Even if it weren't for me having feelings for someone else, it's likely I'd only see you as a friend." she said. She let healing magic pool in her hand as she raised her eyes to the bruise on his cheek. She raised it and started to heal the wound. "You've been a good friend to me, Talvas. This incident changes nothing. I know it's frustrating not to have your feelings answered. Even though I know now where my heart lies...something tells me that it will remain unrequited. Whether or not I take the plunge and tell him anyway really depends on how much I'm willing to sacrifice my own happiness for." she said. She finished healing but Talvas grasped her wrist to keep it nearby and he kissed the pulse there. "That's what I want you to know, Eriah. Why take the chance he'll reject you when you have a man right here who loves you and would do anything to keep you happy?" he asked. The Dragonborn sighed before pulling her wrist back and standing up. "Because I swore to serve him and fight for him first and foremost. My feelings can wait. Besides...another reason I have to leave is right there." she said, pointing at the mannequin bearing Miraak's robes.

Talvas looked up at it before looking back at her. "As long as I'm here, his memory will haunt me. I need to get off this island. Perhaps then, I can come to grips with everything that's happened. I may return someday to visit. But for now...it's too painful." she explained further. Reaching out a hand, Eriah pulled Talvas to his feet. She went around him to the chest at the foot of her bed. She pulled something from it. "Here." she said, holding out two objects. One was a key and the other was an ebony dagger. "This is the key to the manor. Anytime you need some space from Neloth, you're free to use this house however you see fit. I made the dagger for you out of some ebony I had leftover from forging my armor. Consider it a thank-you for being a friend and helping me out while I was here in Solstheim." she said. Talvas took the proffered objects, his red eyes looking over the exquisite craftsmanship of the dagger. "You are...too kind." he said finally. "So I've been told. You're a good man, Talvas. I only hope Neloth gets off his high horse and teaches you something." she said, with a smile.

A knock was heard up at the door and the Dragonborn went to answer it. Talvas remained in the bedroom, looking at the dagger before attaching it to his belt and putting the key in a pouch. Eriah soon returned with Glover Mallory. "Ship's here. Better get this packed away." the woman said as she began to pull Miraak's robes off the mannequin and fetched his weapons from the plaques. The last thing to go in the chest was his mask. "Thanks for your help, Glover." she said. "It's been a real pleasure knowing you, Eriah. I'll handle this." the blacksmith said, taking the chest and heading upstairs to the door. Eriah turned back to the Dunmer. "I guess this is it." she said. Talvas just nodded before reaching out, grasping her wrist, and pulling her against him. "Don't stay away forever. And thank you." he said. Eriah sighed as she hugged him back. When they pulled away, she started pulling on the pieces of her new Daedric Armor. When she was done, she took the helmet off the mannequin, hooking it under her arm, and the two departed the manor.

Reaching the docks, Eriah smiled in greeting at Captain Gjalund Salt-Sage. "Ready to go whenever you are." he said. She nodded and turned to look at Talvas. "Akatosh preserve you, friend." she said. Talvas just nodded and she smiled at him fondly. She got onto the ship and within the hour, they set sail. Eriah watched as Solstheim got farther and farther away before going to stand at the bow. Gjalund came up to stand with her. "You seem quiet, Dragonborn." he noted. "I'm just looking forward to going home. Feels like I've been gone a lifetime. I hope Ulfric's been doing okay without me there to fight." she said. "Knowing the Jarl, he's managed just fine. I've been getting news from Windhelm whenever I docked and it seems the war's been running smoothly." the captain replied. Eriah looked up at the sky before heading to the chest she had Glover bring to the ship. She opened it and looked at Miraak's mask. _"I sure hope I don't regret bringing you back with me. I wonder if I could store this chest in the Palace of the Kings until I'm able to secure the funds to buy Hjerim."_ she thought.

She closed the lid and stood up. She was heading back to the rail when she paused. She thought she heard a voice on the wind. _"You will never escape me."_ it said. It sounded like Miraak's voice and it was almost a whisper. Eriah's brown eyes widened as she whirled around to face the chest. "Is something wrong, Dragonborn?" one of the deckhands asked. No longer hearing the voice of her defeated foe, Eriah shook her head to clear it. Was she imagining things? "Nothing. Nothing at all. Thought I heard something..." she trailed off, her eyes still on her chest. Shaking her head, she placed her Daedric helmet on and went to the railing. Crossing her arms, the Dragonborn decided to just focus on getting home and back to Ulfric's service. She wondered if things would get awkward between them, knowing what she did now. Talvas did, indeed, force her to confront the simple fact that she had fallen in love with the Jarl. She had more or less made up her mind that she couldn't tell him. Deep down, she had a feeling it was one-sided and she didn't want to hear him reject her. Best to let it lie and focus on the war. Matters of the heart could wait when they finally had a breather.


End file.
